Radical Faith

A billion times more than the times, when a grandchild excitedly shows me a bug crawling on his hand, or expectantly shoves a crayon drawing at me, knowing I will treasure it with a hug and kiss and give it the center spot on my cluttered refrigerator! Or the times another child shouts, "Gamma, Gamma, look at me!" while she does a summersault or goes down the slide. Even more than we can comprehend, I KNOW the Lord cares for all the little things that we count important in our adult lives. And those times when I remember this---those times---mostly born of necessity, are the times when I have lived my life with real faith! How different from the times I have lived in fear. I know, and bear record that I know, from first-hand experience that it IS possible to have the spirit with us always! There have been times when I have lived each moment absolutely bathed in the spirit of the Lord, and I have known without a shadow of doubt, that He does care about every single, little thing that is important to us. I know the Lord loves us and cares for us with a similar, but incomprehensibly greater love, than we can possibly have for our loved ones as mortals.

I read another great article at Meridian Magazine that has reminded me of these things that I know, and it has reminded me of how much I desire to live this way---replacing fear with faith---more fully, more constantly.

"Faith that Lets in the Light: Experimenting with Radical Faith" By Wallace Goddard

"Look to me in every thought; doubt not, fear not (D&C 6:36).

"According to King Benjamin, God shows up in every breath we breathe and supports us in every movement we make (Mosiah 2:21; 4:21). He is woven intimately into every moment of our lives—if we choose to see Him there. Radical faith calls us to see God in every detail. God invites us to chat with Him about everything from our furnace to our children’s science fair projects (Alma 34:17-27). While He may not weigh in on our choice of brands for green beans, He is glad to sit with us at dinner and rejoice in the magnificent gift of good food (D&C 59:18)."

"Experimenting with radical faith means not placing our relationship with God on the shelf for large chunks of each day. It is inviting Him into all aspects of our lives. It is looking for His orchestration in the people and experiences placed in our path each week. It is accepting the gift we are offered when we partake of the Sacrament—“that they may ALWAYS have his Spirit to be with [us]” (D&C 20:77, emphasis added)."

"A person with radical faith chooses to feel blessed in every circumstance knowing that God presides in our lives. We count sciatica as a blessing that teaches us patience. We rejoice in miscarriages that teach us faith. We welcome misunderstandings that teach us patience and openness. Rather than believe that human failing and reckless chance are writing the human story, we are serene knowing that, as Robert Browning wrote, “God’s in his heaven, all’s right with the world.”

Stacks of Doilies

I was driving by a cemetery today while a funeral was taking place. The tent. The friends and family. All dressed in black, milling around, and I felt sad to see them. Then I saw the pallbearers carrying the casket toward them. The wave of pain hit me harder than it has in a very long time!

I had to come home and crochet furiously. That is how I got through the grief of Robert, and the pain of open-heart surgery for years. It's ridiculous, the stacks of doilies I have.

False Evidence Appearing Real

Fear is the opposite of faith. After a tiring day teaching the multitudes Christ and his disciples departed in a ship and as Jesus slept a terrible storm began to toss the ship; fearing for their lives they woke their Lord. In Mark 4:39-40 we read, “And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm . And he said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith?”

Too many times I find myself caught in the grip of fear and almost always it is like this acronym: false evidence appearing real. As I pondered this today I was reminded of Jacob’s words in the Book of Mormon. “Behold, my brethren, he that prophesieth, let him prophesy to the understanding of men; for the spirit speaketh the truth and lieth not. Wherefore, it speaketh of things as they really are, and of things as they really will be. . .” (Jacob 4:13)

Things as they really are! Satan constantly presents to my mind, and everyone else who will listen, false evidence which he can make to appear very real indeed!

I found comfort today in Isaiah 61:1-4 as he prophesied of Christ with these marvelous verses: "The spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound; To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified. And they shall build the old wastes, they shall raise up the former desolations, and they shall repair the waste cities, the desolations of many generations.

As I read of the fulfillment of Isaiah's words in Luke 4:16-21 the spirit testified to me again that Jesus Christ lives! He did fulfill His mission! He IS the Christ! He has, again and again, bound up my broken heart—He has comforted me when I mourn, He has given me beauty (my Ron and beautiful children) for ashes (of not having parents!) He has given me joy for mourning, (when I miss my Robert) the garment of praise (when I had no earthly mother or father to tell me that I am adored or loved) for the spirit of heaviness. He has testified to me that I have been planted by the Lord where I am in this life! (It's not very clear why, but I TRUST that someday I will know!) And, He has helped me to build up the old wastes, (in my heart) and raise up the former desolations in my soul! And because I have taught the gospel to my children it is my prayer that the desolations of many generations will be repaired!

I know that God knows my heart and is merciful to those that love Him, and I love Him! And, I know the way to replace fear with faith is to always remember that “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me!” (Philippians 4:13)