Two Pictures

On March 7, 2009 the Alta View Stake held its annual women’s conference. In the class taught by sister Donna Leonard, she displayed this picture. I could not take my eyes off it. It breaks my heart to see the Savior of the world---our Savior so despondent that an angel must come to offer comfort. My mind immediately remembered one of the last lines of my patriarchal blessing. “Thou shall act as administering angel among the discouraged and forlorn. . ." I certainly can't think of too many instances when I have done this, but I know the next time I do I will be thinking "If ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me!" I hope and pray with all my heart that I will have fulfilled this assignment many times before I die.

After the class, I asked Donna where I might obtain a copy of the print. She did not know and does not know the artist, but immediately she pushed the picture into my hands and said, this is yours, you must take it home and enjoy it. She had noticed my fascination with the picture during class and had already been prompted to give it to me. I was so stunned that my tears just flowed at her generosity! I could hardly take the picture it was hers, but the spirit was so strong. How could I not accept? What a wonderful gift and reminder of my mission. I pray that the Lord will bless all of us in the days to come.



The other picture I actually painted! Yes, it is my first and maybe only oil painting. I painted it almost twenty-six years ago right after my last child Rebecca was born as I was recovering from a pretty deep depression. A friend, Sue Turner, from Wheatridge Colorado, brought me an entire set of oil paints, brushes and canvas, because the Lord had inspired that dear administering angel to do so! While I worked, my spirits lifted and then soared. Painting the picture then inspired me to write this poem and I pasted it on the back of my painting. (Can you tell I LOVE flowers?) I haven't read it for years, but it still brings such a wonderful spirit each time I do. It feels like truth!


The Feminine Touch

I know our Elder Brother created the world
and all things thereon . . .
But, everytime I stroke a rose petal
Soft against my face
Or see an orchid or a daisy,
Even on canvas

I WONDER . . . don't you
If He had a little sister
Following close behind,
Adding a finishing touch
or two . . .

by Bonnie Holt

As Donna so lovingly gave me her picture, I reflected that I had also given my one and only painting to a dear friend and neighbor in Colorado, Bonnie Vernon. She had it for years, until she was downsizing when she moved to Utah, and lovingly returned it to me then! How I love my dear friends who also love the Lord and desire to serve as His angels!

Two pictures, both gifts from God---both delivered by angels!

Sunday Before Kate

This is a picture of Kate (Nikoles' baby) and James (Becky's baby due June 22nd) B.B.

Announcing Kate Holt

Our gorgeous baby Kate Holt was born yesterday at 1:18 pm March 4, 2009. She weighed 7 lb. 14 oz. and is 19.5 inches.

My Great, Great, Great, Grandfather

I guess because I was abandonded by both parents and raised by a grandmother who was less than thrilled to do the job (meaning she left the job to me) I have never felt connected to anyone except my husband and children who I am passionately devoted to! But, I have never felt any real connection with ancestors. They have been just names on a pedigree chart. I've wondered if I suffer from some attachment syndrome or something---honestly! I guess when your own mother doesn't even care enough to talk with you more than once in the last 20 years and maybe a contact once a year in the 25+ years before that, it's a little hard to believe that a long-dead realative with thousands in posterity, could even know who you are, let alone care about you.

Yesterday I felt compelled to share this experience in testimony meeting. I resisted as long as my beating heart would allow, thinking that this was another wonderful witness, but that it was only for me. I was quite astounded with the reponse of a few in our ward afterward. Well, I thought that if I should share this experience in my ward I should surely share it with my family and friends.

When I first heard the film presented before the tour of the new Draper Temple it mentioned two of the men who founded Draper. Ebenezar Brown (who is related to Ron) and William Draper who is my Great, Great, Great, Grandfather. These two amazing men where friends who lived through all of the persecution of the church starting with Kirtland until they settled Draper. They became brothers-in-law when William married Phoebe Brown Ebenezar's sister. (Girls remember when your Dad took you to Draper and gave you the tour in the park which contains their statues) I had always known I was related to William Draper. But, when I heard his name mentioned in the film, for the first time I really felt something. He hasn't been far from my thoughts since. Last Saturday we served for hours at the open-house and I thought of him again. I've thought of him in the Jordan River Temple as I have administered in the ordinances there.

I got quite emotional (something I really try not to do in church) as I bore my testimony that the Temple is REAL. The ordinances are REAL. People on the other side really do know who we are! I've always known that I was William Draper's great, great, great granddaughter, but for the first time in my life I know that he knows it too! He knows me and cares about me, and is grateful I think, that I will be serving in the Draper Temple!

GRANDMA'S HANDS

A friend of mine sent an email with this picture and story. It is a five generation picture and I'm sorry I'm not certain who the family is, but the picture and story are beautiful and I wanted to share it with you all.


Grandma, some ninety plus years, sat feebly on the patio bench. She didn't move, just sat with her head down staring at her hands.
When I sat down beside her she didn't acknowledge my presence and the longer I sat I wondered if she was OK.
Finally, not really wanting to disturb her but wanting to check on her at the same time, I asked her if she was OK. She raised her head and looked at me and smiled. 'Yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking,' she said in a clear strong voice.
'I didn't mean to disturb you, grandma, but you were just sitting here staring at your hands and I wanted to make sure you were OK,' I explained to her.
'Have you ever looked at your hands,' she asked. 'I mean really looked at your hands?'
I slowly opened my hands and stared down at them.. I turned them over, palms up and then palms down. No, I guess I had never really looked at my hands as I tried to figure out the point she was making.
Grandma smiled and related this story:
'Stop and think for a moment about the hands you have, how they have served you well throughout your years. These hands, though wrinkled shriveled and weak have been the tools I have used all my life to reach out and grab and embrace life.
'They braced and caught my fall when as a toddler I crashed upon the floor.
They put food in my mouth and clothes on my back. As a child, my mother taught me to fold them in prayer. They tied my shoes and pulled on my boots. They held my husband and wiped my tears when he went off to war.
'They have been dirty, scraped and raw , swollen and bent. They were uneasy and clumsy when I tried to hold my newborn son. Decorated with my wedding band they showed the world that I was married and loved someone special
They wrote my letters to him and trembled and shook when I buried my parents and spouse.
'They have held my children and grandchildren, consoled neighbors, and shook in fists of anger when I didn't understand.
They have covered my face, combed my hair, and washed and cleansed the rest of my body. They have been sticky and wet, bent and broken, dried and raw. And to this day when not much of anything else of me works real well these hands hold me up, lay me down, and again continue to fold in prayer.
'These hands are the mark of where I've been and the ruggedness of life.
But more importantly it will be these hands that God will reach out and take when he leads me home. And with my hands He will lift me to His side and there I will use these hands to touch the face of God.'
I will never look at my hands the same again. But I remember God reached out and took my grandma's hands and led her home. When my hands are hurt or sore or when I stroke the face of my children and husband I think of grandma. I know she has been stroked and caressed and held by the hands of God.
I, too, want to touch the face of God and feel His hands upon my face.

Valentine's Day

I made Ron's first valentine cake 37 years ago when we were engaged, and I haven't missed a year. Yes, this year's cake is lopsided and wrinkly (kind of like Ron & I) but it tastes just as good as ever! Your Dad is still the BEST thing that has ever happened to me. I love you Ron!

More Wisom from Crochet

* FOUNDATIONS: Often a row will seem unremarkable at best and tedious at worst, but the next few rows will reveal that it was a foundation for something beautiful just around the corner. Sometimes the pattern book will instruct you to go over the row again and you think, “I’m doing this again?” Then as you keep going you realize it completed the seemingly plain row before and added texture and dimension and foundation for the next row. Life is like that. The routine, mundane things we do just don’t seem that important yet---but they will if we just keep doing them!

I just can't get this crochet wisdom out of my mind. I thought of another one a couple of days ago and didn't write it down. It's now lost. (That's what happens to 58 year old minds) It made me think of the cute things our babies are saying. If we don't write them down now, they WILL grow up and we WILL forget.

Gospel Lessons I Have Learned from Crochet

I am finally starting a new crochet project! It has been months since I could sit that long due to my bulged disk. It still hurts a little, but I am learning how to cope. So, as I began to crochet this time, my mind reflected on all the lessons I have learned.

* PATIENCE: In my past I have never been known for having much, but I am learning.
* RHYTHM: The rhythm soothes my body and mind. I have time to think and pray. I started crocheting after my first open-heart surgery because I was going out of my mind! I found that the smooth rhythm would help my heart beat stabilize when it was in frib. Occasionally it still does, and it still helps.
* GOOD FOR THE MIND: I love doing the most complicated patterns I can find. I believe they helped my mind after so many mini-strokes threatened to take it away. Brian (who is a computer programmer) looked at my crochet instructions one day and said it looks a lot like computer code.
* OBEDIENCE: I love the precision required. It is like computer code, in that you must be absolutely precise or the pattern will be lost. Every coma, period, chain, double, single or triple crochet, every popcorn stitch etc, etc, etc, must be done with exactness!
* REPENTENCE: I love comparing it to the gospel. If you crochet one round incorrectly the next round becomes distorted. If you keep going like that soon the pattern is random and jumbled and out of shape without much meaning and not very pretty. However, if you "repent" by pulling out the mistakes and starting again, the pattern emerges and it is orderly and beautiful! That is like our lives. If we follow the “Plan of Happiness” our Heavenly Father has provided we can create something meaningful and beautiful out of our lives.
* CORRECT PATTERN: Sometimes I get a pattern off the internet. Too often the pattern has mistakes in it. You can imagine the trouble that causes. I’m grateful to have the restored gospel, with a plan I can trust! Our Father cannot change the pattern because it was "predicated" in Heaven before the foundations of the world, and because it is the pattern that works! But, He has provided our Savior Jesus Christ and because of Him we can back up, repent, and then go on! Also, whenever I have corrected a mistake in project, eventually it turns out beautifully and I can never tell you where the mistake was or even remember making one as I enjoy the perfect finished piece. I love that principle—though our sins be as scarlet, if we repent, they will be white as snow!
* PERSPECTIVE: Sometimes I like to try a pattern that doesn't have a picture, just to see what will emerge. Our lives are like that. We can't see the big picture, but I like to remember that our Heavenly Father can. If we keep following HIS pattern our lives will turn out just fine.
* ENDURE TO THE END: I love the good feeling of completing a project. Occasionally I put one away that I didn't have time to finish or grew bored with. At that point it is simply a waste of time, just knots tied into string, stuffed away in a drawer and of no use. But, if I complete the project, wash it, block it and use it; it is beautiful. It is even more satisfying if I give it to a friend! I have realized that too often for the last ten years since my son died, I have not progressed. I have hid behind my closed door. Lately, having been called to teach Gospel Doctrine and with a new calling at the Draper Temple to be an assistant coordinator, I have been pushed out of my comfort zone. I guess it’s time to share myself more and become what Heavenly Father wants me to be instead of all tied up in knots.
* IT BECOMES EASIER: At first a new pattern is hard. I have to really work at it to get it right, and it doesn’t look like much at first. But, as I try so very hard to read, re-read, check each stitch and really pay attention a beautiful pattern begins to emerge which spurs me on! Then as I become familiar with it, like when doing squares for a tablecloth that repeats, I can get too complacent. I don’t pay attention to detail and then find that I have made stupid mistakes. Life can be like that when we don’t pay attention!
* KNITTING: Knitting is usually more practical. (Remember the ALL the hats and scarves I knit a few years ago for Christmas?) But, you have to pay closer attention because it is sooooo much harder to unpick. Life’s big decisions like marriage and career choices are like that too.
* CROSS STITCH & HARDANGER DRIVES ME CRAZY: I had to give up cross stitch and I never did complete Kathy Samsel’s beautiful hardanger. It is just stress and not worth the price I pay to do it! I have learned that we cannot do or enjoy doing everything, and that’s okay too!

Types and Shadows

Yesterday I listened to many of the Inaugural proceedings as I cleaned my house. I listened to the prayers (and thanked my Heavenly Father that we are privileged to live in a land that STILL prays)! I've heard many this morning who took offense at the closing prayer. It didn't occur to me to do that, it made me smile. It felt sincere. I winced for President Obama as he stumbled over the oath. He must have been nervous. I prayed in my heart that he would be in tune with heaven, that he would feel the prayers of a nation. I don't agree with any of his liberal views and they frankly scare me. I just pray that he will moderate as he realizes the burden of his office.

I marveled at our form of government and I felt the spirit reconfirm to me that this land was born with the hand of providence for the purpose of restoring the gospel of Jesus Christ, and that this land is still in the Lord's hands. I am comforted by the promise that the gospel will not be taken from the earth again, but will endure and blossom during the millennium. I don't know what trials we have to endure before that day, but I sang the song in my heart (which I KNOW to be true) "Victory, victory, through Jesus Christ our Lord!"

I was also struck with the thought that our government, our constitution with it's division of power and the amazing way that power is transferred from President to President and other elected offices by the people, in an orderly and peaceful manner, is a type and a shadow. A type and a shadow always happens in history to foreshadow a coming event, such as Abraham sacrificing his son, foreshadowing the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. It struck me that perhaps the government of this nation was a foreshadowing of the Church of Jesus Christ of latter day Saints; how our church transitions from one prophet to the next (with far less fanfare) and in complete order. And then I thought of how Abraham did not have to sacrifice his son, but how our Father in Heaven literally did; the real event so complete and perfect whereas the type and shadow just that, a shadow. I thought of how each type and shadow builds toward perfection, and then my heart soared as I imagined the culmination of that PERFECT transfer of power one day when Christ will reign on earth as King of Kings and Lord of Lords! Now that is THE inauguration I pray to behold!

Draper Temple

Ron and I had the wonderful opportunity to host a V.I.P. tour of the Draper Temple for our stake on Friday, January 9, 2009. Some of the general authorities as well as stake presidents lead tours of their families and various others through. We were stationed in the stake center, but they graciously let each host couple tag along on one of the many tours.

The temple is of course breathtaking! The celestial room rises five stories! I can't wait to plan at least an hour in there just gazing up. It makes you look up! I hope and pray that Ron and I get called to work in this new temple. We will be released in March from our assignment at the Jordan River Temple.

I just want to bear my testimony again that first, God lives! Jesus is the Christ! That I have had the privelege of feeling the Holy Ghost (who is also a God) bear witness to me of this fact! President Monson is the prophet of the Lord for the whole world! Joseph Smith did restore the gospel of Jesus Christ, in it's fullness, in these latter days! The temple IS the house of the LORD! And, I love my family so much!

I have included a link so that friends and family who live too far away to come to the open house, can have a glimpse inside this beautiful temple. I will definately tend Aubrie, Jules, so you can go when you are home next! For everyone else "please" take this opportunity to take your children and let them experience the beauty and reverance and wonder of the temple! Also, in the beginning film our children's ancestors were mentioned twice! Guernsy Brown on Ron's side and William Draper on mine! Be sure to listen for them.

And, I cannot fail to mention the other most significant thing that happened on January 9th! It was our beautiful and wonderful firstborn grandaughter's 12th birthday! Ron and I take the older kids out for their birthday and Becky hit a new milestone this year. She requested Ihop for lunch! At first it was always McDonalds, then she graduated to Wendys, and now . . . ! Happy birthday sweet girl. We love you so much!

http://www.ldsmag.com/churchupdate/090114tour.html