Santa Comes Early to Grandparents!

We figured Santa would be busy enough visiting our twelve wonderful grandchildren tonight, so he came to our home this evening! As I write this post on Christmas Eve at five minutes to twelve, I'm wearing my soft baby blue p.j.s my husband gave me, and I'm tickled about the gift card—I'm rich! Well, certainly rich in blessings!!!! Ron plugged in his new Norelco so he can have a good shave in the morning too! We waited to open some of our children's gifts so they can share the fun. I also took Ron to the movies this afternoon after he took me to the temple this morning! We saw “The Blindside.” I'm glad I had a pocket full of Kleenex for my cold, 'cause I cried like a baby nearly the whole movie! Everyone needs to see this movie. We definitely want to buy this one. If you've seen this movie then you might understand my sadness in my last post for people caught in poverty. REAL POVERTY—and why a toy for a tot at Christmas is a drop in the bucket of the needs of people in deep poverty. The movie is beautiful and ends on such a high! And, it's based on a very true story!

Then tonight I read a review in Meridian Magazine (I love this online magazine) about Dickens "A Christmas Carol." This amazing story opened the eyes of the people of his time to the cruelty and poverty of Dickens world, and probably gave birth to the idea of giving to the poor at Christmas time. Society has come such a long, long way in caring for the poor, but watching this movie today illustrates that there is still such a long way to go. When all the poor are cared for the way "Big Mike" was, then we will have Zion! It made me realize why I just can't participate in Sub for Santa's—the need is SO MUCH BIGGER than that, and I can't do what Sandra Bullock did for Big Mike. I feel too small for the enormity of the problem and terrified that I might do more harm than good by a pittance at Christmas time!

If that wasn't enough (I've never had such time on my hands on Christmas Eve before) tonight, I decided to read through a few old journal entries. I haven't been a great journal keeper — not a consistent one for sure — but I ran into this one from

January 26, 1998: "Well, I haven’t written in my journal for a very long time. Becky is in Florida with Kristi and Ron and I are alone. Just on an impulse I stopped by to look at an Ivory home again. It was lovely and upstairs was a magnificent master suite, with three other bedrooms. A nursery, a little boys room, and a little girls room. As I slowly passed through them I felt waves of nostalgia— I will never need a home like this again in this life. My children are nearly raised. The future stretches out before me, and the same question my children are asking becomes mine, “What shall I do when I grow up?” I may only be half-finished with my life! (Of course I could die tomorrow—one never knows.) But, if I live, forty-seven more years is a long time. Ron asked (I think almost sincerely) if we should adopt more children. But, I don’t think that is what the Lord would have me do now. I don’t think I could go through all that again. I know I have learned many, many things—but . . .I’m more inclined to think I’d better just pass them on to the good of my grandchildren! Anyway, I think I would like to write! Really write! Write such gripping and well told stories, that they hook people, and then bear a powerful witness of the Savior and His plan! Just knock the reader over! And then lift him to heaven! Make people go away from a book of mine feeling good—really, really good about life, with a resolve to live better, serve better, trust the Lord more completely, and most of all to turn to Him for their consolation! That’s what my desire is—to bring souls unto Christ!—with the power of the written word. I prayed that the Lord would give me this gift so that I might serve Him. Now I feel that I must write something everyday—practice if you will, before He would ever grant such a gift to me. So begins the day!"

Little did I know that just one year later my son would have chosen to end his life, and my heart would literally be broken in every way, and then only two months later I would have open heart surgery for a hole in my heart that had been causing mini-strokes for the last several years. It took a long, long time to heal physically, especially since I had the surgery AGAIN the next year. Compared to my grief, it was easy to heal a broken heart physically. It's been ten years! For most of them I didn't even so much as write a letter until my daughter encouraged me to start this blog. Did I really ever feel that way about writing? Such passion! Now, it really doesn't matter. I just want to do what the Lord would have me do — whatever that is — WHATEVER that is! Whatever shall I do with my life when/if I grow up? What?

The Other Side of Christmas

There is another side of Christmas which is so hard for the poor, the downhearted, the discouraged and the lonely. I have to hold my childhood memories of Christmas at a far, far distance to keep them from engulfing me in the old gloom. I have to be so careful of well meaning Christmas stories. At the end of November a dear friend gave me a Christmas book entitled "Small Change." My first impression was that I should set it aside, at least for another season (other than Christmas) but my friend had given the book to me and so I read it. Oh my. I should have listened to my first impressions. So, the first part of this month started out with the painful old memories of my childhood; but slowly, the beauty of the season wrapped it's comforting arms around me as I reflected on all the things I have learned to LOVE about Christmas!

I love the music, I love the lights, I love my family gathered around. I love the gifts shared with loved ones, the cookies from neighbors, the shine in children's eyes, the Christmas program in church,and most of all the story of Jesus! I love all these things because I am on that beautiful side of Christmas now! And, this year I love the night I got to spend with my own flesh and blood sisters, with whom I was not raised, but am now just beginning to know! (And I love them!) We attended BYU's Christmas of Dance from around the world together. It was beautiful and warm and I felt loved.

I can say that I am glad that my friend shared this book with me because it has made me think again about writing "The Other Side of Christmas!" Most people will wonder what wasn't wonderful about the book "Small Change." It did have a good message, but my friend didn't have a clue that it would affect me like it did and I don't think she quite understands now. I know it hurt her very much to think she had caused me pain by giving me this gift. I should not have told her how it effected me, but I wanted her to understand. (I love my friend very much!)

Every year I've had this need to help people understand how hard it is for the poorest of the poor at this time of year especially. In my novel "Joy Outweighs The Sorrow" I coined the phrase, "the only real poverty is spiritual" and that's the worst kind of poverty to have at Christmas time. It's one of those things, that unless you've lived it, you would never understand. I have thought every Christmas that I need to write about "the other side of Christmas" to somehow help others understand, but I never do. I end up getting past that painful part of Christmas and then go on with my life.

Our neighbor and former bishop now works for the LDS Church heading the humanitarian division of the welfare program. He told us how the church has added Caring for the Poor as the fourth leg of the mission of the Church---along with, Proclaiming the Gospel, Perfecting the Saints and Redeeming the Dead. That is wonderful and exciting because it will bring us closer to Zion---closer to the time when we will have "no poor among us!" There is a way to care for the poor that lifts the "arms that hang down" but it ONLY works when done in the Lord's way!

“I would that ye should do alms unto the poor,” the Savior declared, “but take heed that ye do not your alms before men to be seen of them; otherwise ye have no reward of your Father who is in heaven” (3 Ne. 13:1; see also Matt. 6:1–2). I would add that unless we do alms for the poor in secret as the Savior counseled and out of the "true charity" of our hearts, or in other words with the "pure love of Christ" the adversary of us all will use the alms done to be seen of men, to do far more harm, and cause the poor to sink more deeply into despair and hopelessness!

In the book "Small Change" the author helps the protagonist find a solution to giving alms in secret, by using their church pastor dressed as Santa Claus as the vehicle. It sounds lovely, but it is wrong---so wrong. Only someone who is on "the other side of Christmas" could understand why that simply doesn't work and still hurts! That is what I wanted my friend to understand. Santa Claus is not our Savior! I testify that only Jesus of Nazareth, can save us---from sin, from sorrow, and from poverty of even the worst kind! And only Jesus Christ can teach us how to properly care for the poor as we progress toward Zion---where the pure in heart dwell, and where we will have no poor among us!

Create

What Is Love?

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, 'What does love mean?' The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:

'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.' Rebecca- age 8

'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.' Billy - age 4

'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.' Karl - age 5

'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.' Chrissy - age 6

'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.' Terri - age 4

'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.' Danny - age 7

'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss' Emily - age 8

'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.' Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)

'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,' Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)

'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.' Noelle - age 7

'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.' Tommy - age 6

'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.' Cindy - age 8

'My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.' Clare - age 6

'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.' Elaine-age 5

'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.' Chris - age 7

'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.' Mary Ann - age 4

'I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.' Lauren - age 4

'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.' (what an image) Karen - age 7

'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.' Jessica-age 8

And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, 'Nothing, I just helped him cry'

A Few Times I've Seen "His" Image

Last week I was at DSW shoe store and noticed a tiny beautiful grey haired lady. We smiled as we passed each other and I had to turn around and watch her for a moment. Then as I was trying on a pair of shoes she startled me by giving her opinion of them. We struck up a conversation and I commented on her delightful accent. She was born and raised in England, but moved to Salt Lake in the 70's after joining the church. I wish I'd had a camera to capture "Ettie's" sweet face. This little woman in her eighties goes about doing good. After hearing of the divorces of some of the royal family in England, Ettie actually wrote a letter of encouragement to the Queen, telling her that under her difficult circumstances, Ettie believed she had been a good mother. The Queen of England graciously wrote back expressing appreciation for the encouragement. I could imagine gracious little Ettie being comfortable around the Queen and equally comfortable in the most humble shack. She made ME feel so wonderful, I walked out of that store feeling like a queen myself!

She reminded me of an old man I met in China in 2006 when Ron and I were privileged to visit Beijing and Xian on a company convention. We were in Beijing, rushing as a large group through Jingshan Park down a covered walkway, when I passed this old man riding slowly on a curious, oversized tricycle. He smiled up at me and I immediately felt wonder—I felt loved. I felt a safe, warm, electric connection and I wondered who he was. I stopped to take his picture and then he held my hand and patted it and looked into my soul with his wise old beautiful, light filled eyes! This all happened within moments and then Ron was there pulling me away—away from a timeless place, far removed from the bustle and noise—to rejoin our group before we became separated. I felt the glow for hours.

These rare and memorable encounters remind me of a quote from C.S. Lewis: "There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts civilization—these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a knit. But it is immortals with whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit—immortal horrors or everlasting splendors . . . your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses. It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship . . . ~C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory, (1949)

These encounters also remind me of Alma 5:14: "And now behold, I ask of you my brethren of the church, have ye spiritually been born of God. Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts?"

A few times in my life I have truly seen "His" image!

Life Is A Blessing

Ron and I watched a movie tonight (in between trick or treaters) about a Dr. who went to Calcutta, India to escape his life. He'd lost a young patient and intended never to practice medicine again. While there his wallet was stolen and he was stranded for three weeks waiting for a new passport and funds. Of course he ended up befriending the local people and helping out the local medical clinic whose Dr. had left, and in the process found he had never been happier.

I was so moved by the poverty and hardship of the people's lives and amazed by the cruelty and inhumanity of some people. Lately I've been thinking about how corrupt almost all of this world's societies have been. Most people that have ever lived, have been enslaved by wicked, power hungry, selfish and brutal men; only a few times in the history of the world have there been perfect and happy societies. It makes me so sad. I've wondered how Heavenly Father can stand the grief.

While watching the movie I nearly cried as I wondered why some people were born into such poverty and hardship, but then, I had the most distinct and amazing thought that their circumstances are NOT a punishment but a blessing.

"A blessing?" I questioned in wonder.

I received an immediate and again distinct answer, "Yes — for all that experience will be "but a moment" and will serve them well through all of eternity.

Amazing! Our Heavenly Father truly loves His children as He watches over them, comforts them, weeps with them and rejoices over their triumphs! Truly ALL things will work together for our good if we but love the Lord. I feel better tonight — about the world. There are bullies here, but most people are humble and good, and even the bullies are loved by their Heavenly Father and are learning wonderful lessons. Again I am comforted that one day "every knee shall bow, and every tongue confess that Jesus is the Christ!"

I Can't Count My Blessings!

My goodness. I started counting my blessing this morning and my cup is running over! Isn't fall just the most beautiful season? But, then there is the new beauty of spring and of course the quiet rest and stillness of winter! Ah, but can anything surpass a summer rose? I love this beautiful world the Lord has given us!

Christ as Our Forerunner

Whither the forerunner is for us entered, even Jesus, made an high priest for ever after the order of Melchisedec. Hebrews 6:20

This morning I read a post on Donna's blog "Connections" about Christ as our Forerunner. "A forerunner is an extremely picturesque and evidently ancient calling. He may now be seen to the best advantage in the large towns of Egypt. When rich people drive or ride abroad, a servant attends them, called, a sais, or groom, whose duty it is to run on foot at some distance in front of his master’s horse or carriage."

According to Donna this runner clears the way in the busy crowded streets, opens gates, announces and waits upon their master. As I contemplate the Savior of the Universe doing something like this for me, it takes my breath away! I seem at a loss for words to express myself. It truly is something amazing to contemplate and gives us an insight into how the Lord views us and our potential! I cannot help but think of the temple and what we learn about there.

I recommend going to Donna's site to read her entire post. For me it is an incredibly deeper insight into "Christ as our advocate with the Father!"

http://donna-connections.blogspot.com/2009/10/christ-as-foreunner.html

Utopia/Zion

Almost thirty years ago when we lived in Denver, Brother Daniel Ludlow taught a class that I took. I can't remember much about it except that he said something that has stuck with me through the years. He said that if you want to know what will soon come to pass in the Lord's Kingdom, then listen carefully to what the adversary is about. For instance, before Joseph Smith had the first vision, there was a religious revival going on which was confusing and divisive. Before the blacks received the priesthood the world was stirred up over the civil rights movement. He said in essence that satan gets there first to distort people's thinking and to try and thwart the Lord's plan---to present a counterfeit if you will.

Today we are hearing a great divide in our nation and the world. It really is the war in heaven still raging. I just heard a commentator on the radio accuse a liberal caller of wanting a Utopia that will never work because she didn't believe in freedom. To want the government to redistribute everyones money by taking from the rich and giving to the poor will destroy incentive and take away everyone's prosperity (I agree). Satan uses many truths to present one distortion, such as gross inequality in the world is wrong (with which I also agree) but then he presents a false plan to equalize the problem. However, the reason the "Utopia" of the adversary will never work is one word---force---satan's counterfeit for Zion. Sir Winston Churchill said, "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery."

The Lord's plan WILL work because when people choose to work together for the good of everyone in their community there really will be "no poor among us" and we will be happy like the Nephites after the coming of Christ! I have heard it stated that it takes a MORAL people to have a representative government like we in the United States are blessed to have (which almost everyone agrees is certainly hanging by a thread) but a Zion government will take nothing less than a people with pure hearts and perfectly righteous minds, united as one!

I haven't thought of Brother Ludlow's comment for years, but this morning it came into my mind as I realized how much of this stuff we've been hearing. We've just been blessed to hear again the Lord's plan of happiness for His children during Conference! Our Bishop said this last Sunday, that he prayed for Zion in our ward and that we should strive for it in our families and that we CAN create in within ourselves, right here, right now! How exciting! I really do believe that the time is coming (oh please let it be soon) that we will ALL live in peace and prosperity together in Zion!

Sharing Family Stories of Faith

This is a link to an article in Meridian Magazine about sharing family stories. Anne you would especially like it I think!

http://www.meridianmagazine.com/turninghearts/100709history.html